One of the things we’ve all had to come to terms with the last 18 months has been waiting. You can call it patience, lockdown, a closed door, or just not the right time, but in the end, we’ve all been waiting. Waiting for something to happen, waiting for something to be over, waiting for our next opportunity or simply waiting for our turn. Since high school, I remember having a feeling of always wanting the next thing to happen or wishing for the future in some way. Can I just graduate already? College will be so much better! I can’t wait to move away from home and be a grown-up. I can’t wait to be a sophomore so I can live in the sorority house. I can’t wait to graduate and move to Chicago. I can’t wait to…

When always looking ahead there was a lot I missed that was right in front of me. 2020 and even 2021 has been the longest period of waiting I’ve experienced and it’s been on my heart to write about it for a while now. As many of you know we moved to Nashville in November 2020 and started a new chapter of our lives here after living in Chicago for 5 years. I remember being in college and waiting for the weekend Kollin and I would finally move in together after graduation and dating long distance for 3.5 years. I remember waiting for fulfilling the idea of being who I finally wanted to be while living in the city. I remember waiting for the big job I was going to land and the career that was going to start there. I remember waiting for what would become our home. It felt like my senior year was a giant year of waiting.

And when Chicago came, it was amazing. But you know what filled the spaces of the things we finally got? More things we were waiting for. I couldn't wait to move to a new, bigger apartment closer to downtown. I couldn’t wait to make my blog better and get a promotion at work. I was constantly looking forward and constantly in a period of waiting for the next thing. Feeling like I was running toward the next goal, running toward making my next move or planning years in advance of where we were at the moment.

I think as we get older this pressure of what’s next and what your plan will be becomes really real. Maybe it’s just the way we were raised or a high sense of ambition, but it’s a common thread amongst many people I know personally and those I see on social media as well. How long do you stay in the moment of something before you’re looking for your next moment? How long do you appreciate the accomplishment before striving for the next? Do you even celebrate a milestone if there is a bigger one in front of it? When you get engaged the first question is ‘when’s the wedding?’ And then like clockwork, the questions about babies and homes and bigger and better jobs start.

I’ve struggled with this myself in a lot of different areas, but the last 6 months or so have really helped me focus on letting go of the tight grip on the future and being really ok with the present moment even if it doesn’t look like what I or society expected of me. Maybe our current situation doesn’t look like we thought it would 9 months ago when we moved or we have different choices in front of us than the ones we mapped out but isn’t that the beauty of life? The moments in between that help you focus and reground yourself? The moments that make you step back and say is this really what I want?

Living in the unplanned and unsure has been challenging for me to say the least, but I’ve been really comforted by the saying:

Remember when you prayed for exactly where you are right now?

That quote may not be as literal of a reminder to some, but it’s helped me find the peace within the moment I’m in and what I’ve accomplished thus far. I remember when I didn’t want to leave Chicago and was terrified of losing everything we had built there if we moved. I remember being so happy when Kollin came home with champagne when I hit 1,000 followers on Instagram and then hoping and working toward the next thousand. I remember praying for guidance as I wanted to leave a job and was unsure of what my career would look like if I did. But, sitting here at this moment typing to over 6k of you, with a marketing career still intact, a happy husband, corgi, and life in Nashville, I’m so grateful.

Every one of us is waiting for something and while there are many of us who are waiting for something trivial compared to others, the lesson is the same: remember to stop and have gratitude. I’m a believer in the idea that rejection is actually redirection and this period of waiting is actually preparing us for what is truly the right path.

The path to where you are might have looked different than you planned or been harder than you expected, but you’re here. I’ve learned timing isn’t everything and we’ve all seen that plans get derailed. Things get postponed, and waiting is inevitable, but it’s the right now that makes the future what it is - so revel in it. While you’re busy looking forward remember to look back and see how far you’ve come.